you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
