she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
