I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I just want nice things and good sex
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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