so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
