Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
