I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
