so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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