I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i love accidental penises.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
