I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
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