She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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