Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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