Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I just forgot I was standing up.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
