before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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