it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
