dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I smell stomach acid.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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