This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
