Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
