Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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