whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
it was like eating out sand paper
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Randomize
