did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
not ubering you a puppy
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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