how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
