his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
