but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
