Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
