spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
