dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
