What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize