I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
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