I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
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