You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
