I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
