We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
