your room smells of hookers.
And success
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
