She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I have post one night stand depression
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
