Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize