Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
