Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
