We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Life is so much better after having sex.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
