Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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