oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
