my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I supernannyed him into submission
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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