i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
