so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
