hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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