So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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