that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
