2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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