butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
