Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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