Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
